


What's Left

by ch0c0_s1im3



Series: You're Still Alive [2]
Category: BanG Dream! (Anime), BanG Dream! Girl's Band Party! (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Hurt No Comfort, Minor Violence, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:46:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,817
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28278603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ch0c0_s1im3/pseuds/ch0c0_s1im3
Summary: Hina Hikawa visits her sister's grave
Relationships: Hikawa Hina & Hikawa Sayo, Imai Lisa & Minato Yukina
Series: You're Still Alive [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2068794
Kudos: 16





	1. Hina Hikawa

Hello there, my name is Hina Hikawa! My birthday is on the 20th of March, and I love sweet stuff like candy and bubblegum! Recently, I had a growth spurt, and I grew to almost as tall as Sa- my Onee-chan was!

My idol business in Pasupare is really taking off, and my grades in school are all really good too! I've been working hard with Haza- Tsugu-chin to sort out all the student council issues I missed. I even joined Roselia's practices temporarily to fill the hole my Onee-chan left.

Onee-chan...

You see, that day really wasn't boppin' my Onee-chan protected me from harm without hesitation, that's why I'm able to stand here, alive, today. Of course, I would have gladly taken my Onee-chan's place, but thinking like that would be disrespectful to my Onee-chan who sacrificed herself for me.

That's why, in a world without my Onee-chan, I'll continue to live on. Even... Even without her by my side.

\--------------

"S- Hina," A stern, calm voice called out.

"Hm?" I answered, "what is it Yukina-chan?"

"Practice is over," she said coldly, "thank you for your hard work today."

I looked around the empty room, Ako-chan and Rinko-chan already left, I must have been playing on auto-pilot.

"Aren't you going to visit Hina today?" Lisa asked me softly, her eyes were strained and her smile seemed forced.

"Lisa-chii, I told you to stop making that joke!" I shouted while pouting, "just because the grave says my name doesn't me she's not Onee-chan!"

"R-right," she said, nervously laughing, "sorry, Hina..."

"It's okay Lisa-chii," I said while wrapping her in a small hug, "I know you're just trying to make me feel better."

Lisa winced as I said that, she softly patted me on the head while looking away.

"Anyways, I'm gonna get going now," I said as I unwrapped myself from Lisa and picking up my guitar case and the bouquet, "bye!"

\--------------

I slowly skipped my way to Onee-chan's grave from CiRCLE, Onee-chan wouldn't mind waiting a little longer, she never liked me rushing around anyway.

I studied the bouquet Ran helped me make, red camellias decorated the middle while white chrysanthemums and red spider lilies alternated in the outer ring. Ran had told me the camellias were something about love and something else boppin', but she didn't tell me about what the chrysanthemums or red spider lilies meant, maybe she was trying to send Onee-chan a message for me!

As I entered the cemetery, I thought about how weird it was that all the dead people went to the same spot, wouldn't it be better if they were close to their families? The graveyard was empty and lonely, as always, but it gave me and Onee-chan more time to talk, boppin'!

I clutched the flowers tightly as I approached the headstone and saw my name, it always made me feel weird that it was my name and not Onee-chan's. I had asked mom and dad to change it multiple times and they promised they'd do it, but they never seemed to get around to it.

"Sorry to keep you waiting, Onee-chan," I said as I laid the flowers in front of the headstone, "today I made cookies for you, I even made them dog-shaped! I have a lot I want to tell you, so let's eat these while talking!"

"Meow..."

Suddenly, a grey cat appeared from behind the grave, it's fur was pristine and it swished its tail excitedly as it looked at me with sparkling eyes.

"Oh hello there, kitty!" I said as I reached out to pet the cute little furball, it purred contentedly as I scratched its head, "what's the matter, are you hungry?"

I looked in my guitar case pouch to see if I had brought any other snacks, but sadly not, "ah, but I only have cookies today, and those are for- ah!"

I yelped in surprise as the cat snatched the bag and tore it open, it started devouring the cookies at an ungodly speed. Oh well, Onee-chan wouldn't mind the cat eating some of the cookies, she always had a soft spot for anything small and fluffy.

"Ahaha! You already opened the bag? You're so greedy, I like your energy!" I continued petting it's back while it continued stuffing its cheeks, "Woah, slow down, if you keep taking such big bites you'll look just like a hamster..."

"... just... like..."

The memories came flooding back, Hina's innocent laugh as she picked up the small rodent with surprising delicacy, her laughter as she stroked its back while it continued stuffing itself without a care in the world. "Ahaha!" Her laugh echoed through my mind like an alarm, "is this a hamster, it's so cute!"

The dam broke as all my tears were released, "Hina..." I cried as I buried my face into my palms.

"That's right Sayo Hikawa, you're just as pathetic as you always we're."

The voice came back, the voice that plagued me whenever I wasn't Hina. My chest tightened and my head started spinning as I dug my nails into my face.

"SHUT UP!" I screamed as I slammed my head into the ground.

"It should have been you."  
"Your parents don't love you as much as her"  
"Why do you think they let you become her?"  
"Your friends too."

"LIES! LIES! LIES!" I continued screaming, the cat was long gone by now.

But they were right, no matter how much I didn't want to accept it, my parents wouldn't love me more than their genius child, my friends wouldn't put up with my acting if it wasn't Hina, who would settle for the lesser Hikawa twin anyways? They all want Hina back, there is no place in this world for Sayo Hikawa.

That's why Sayo Hikawa can't exist anymore.

"Hina..." I said sobbing while clutching her headstone, "I'm sorry I was so careless, please come back"

"Useless."  
"She's gone."  
"Repent."

"It should have been me, Hina, please come back, I shouldn't have tried to run, I shouldn't have been such a horrible sister. If anything it should have been me!"

"Not enough."  
"She can't hear you."  
"That won't bring her back."

"Why did you have to push me out of the way, I should have been dead right then and there, why do you care about me so much!"

"Blaming her?"  
"She'll hate you."  
"You really are the worst older sister."

The voices sent me into a spiral as my eyes dried from the lack of tears and my tongue felt like sandpaper. My hands and legs were numb and I couldn't move.

Then, it hit me. Suddenly, everything was as clear as day, the voices stopped except for one.

"Do it."

"I'll never listen to you," I said as I slammed my head into the grave with all the force I could muster.

"I'LL NEVER LISTEN!"


	2. Sayo Hikawa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Imai Lisa and Minato Yukina go visit Hina's grave.

"I'm really worried about Sayo, you know?" Imai Lisa said, her usual cat-like smile was gone, replaced by a grimace and tired eyes, "what she said just now was..."

"Sayo is stronger than you think," Minato Yukina replied with confidence, "I am sure she will be able to pull through this obstacle with our support."

"I know, I know... It's just that, what she said just now... It hurt so badly."

"Stay strong Lisa, think about how Sayo feels."

Lisa clutched her skirt as she worried about her friend, it had been a few weeks since Sayo had started impersonating Hina from the shock and guilt of the younger Hikawa's death, and she didn't know how to handle this.

Even if she was trying to be Hina, she still showed the Sayo within her subtly, the stress causing her to overwork because she needed to distract herself, the wounds on her palms when she got too stressed and pierced the heel of her palms with her nails. Every so often Lisa would be able to hear Sayo stutter out her last name, Imai, and she wanted so desperately to hear her say it. Three simple syllables, "Imai-san," that would bring her so much relief. But Yukina was right, it was selfish of Lisa to think this way.

"Why are we here again?" Yukina asked Lisa as they walked through the front gates of the cemetery.

"I wanted to pay my respects to Hina you know," Lisa said laughing nervously.

"And check up on Sayo."

"Fine, is it so bad I want to see how one of our best friends are doing at their worst?"

"I didn't say that. I merely wanted to confirm this with you."

"Well okay, we can see if Sayo is okay, pay some respects to Hina, and then we can take her out to a family restaurant for some fries okay?"

"That sounds reasonable, I am quite-"

Yukina stopped as she froze in place, her eyes twitched a little through her mask of neutrality.

"Yu~kina~" Lisa called out in her sing-song voice, it always was effective in getting her back to earth.

"Hina's grave, now, I hear her."

It wasn't surprising that Yukina's well-trained ears for music could pick up soft sounds better than Lisa, but what was surprising was when Yukina took off in a full sprint. In almost a decade, Lisa had never seen Yukina sprint at full speed.

"Yukina! What is it?" She shouted as Yukina stopped a few metres away from Hina's grave.

Lisa's eyes filled with horror as she surveyed the scene in front of her. She felt a piercing pain in her chest and her stomach somersaulted, threatening to spill her lunch back out. 

In front of them, Sayo Hikawa kneeled in front of Hina's grave, blood splattered across her forehead and face and stained her short teal hair. The ground she was on was dyed a dark red and the words "Hina Hikawa" we're no longer discernable on the gravestone through the strips of red that ran down and across the words. She wrapped herself around the gravestone but was as limp as a ragdoll.

"Sayo!" The childhood friends shouted together as they both rushed towards Sayo. 

There was a huge red gash on her forehead and Sayo's eyes were blank. Yukina immediately called an ambulance while Lisa cradled her head in her lap. 

"Sayo!" She cried as she tried to stop the bleeding by forcing her jacket onto the red gash. But the injury was too big, and Lisa was too late, she had failed to save her.

"Sayo, no, please don't go, I can't suffer the loss of another friend!" Hot tears streamed down her face as she clutched her uniform.

Eventually, Yukina wrapped herself around Lisa, hugging her tightly as she also cried. They both buried their faces into each other's shoulders as they realised they had truly lost the guitarist of Roselia.

"I'm sorry Sayo," Yukina whispered into her ear, "I'm sorry I trusted you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope this hurt as well!


End file.
